Day 14

Woke up at 9.30. I was talking with S till late night – 🙂 happily. I Went to my mom’s place for lunch yesterday and a neighbour also gave me food – which I kept for dinner. I ate way too much yesterday and drunk one litre of mango juice. My sister and her whole family was sitting there at my mom’s place. I’d never have gone if I had known. I got the piano cable. But I could not find my camera there. I wonder where I kept it. Did I already bring it to the new flat?

It’s been 14 days and I still haven’t quit smoking. I haven’t created any good habit – except for this journal of course. I’m wasting way too much time watching TV and playing games. I should cut back. After observing myself for these few days, I believe I have an addictive personality. As in, I get addicted to just about anything (but only the useless things like smoking or TV). And I get distracted by just about anything. Combined together those are completely destroying my productivity. I just spend whole weekends doing nothing else but just watch TV. Even if I try to do anything useful, I turn on the TV and do a half-ass job while being continuously distracted by the TV. Even now while writing this journal I keep opening new browser tabs.

I need to stop getting distracted so much. I should also stop multitasking – especially keeping the TV on while doing something else. It’s ok if I just hold my attention for half an hour – I should do it without watching TV or switching tabs. Taking breaks – I should not take random breaks just about anytime it occurs to me. I have to plan and time my breaks. When I get back from a break, I should already decide exactly when I’ll take the next break. Stop checking the phone all the time and keep proper schedules for playing video games. There’s absolutely no use watching all those youtube videos. Oh God I just opened a video game on the mobile right now!

3 days more for S’s birthday. Should I do something special? Or just stop with a simple birthday wish? I don’t even know why I’m still talking with her. Sometimes I feel like we’re connecting back again, sometimes the shade of the old problems just show again. I feel like she keeps worrying that people will blame her for something. Her first instinct when the shopping plan we had yesterday got cancelled was to say that I should have gone alone – now I’m going to blame her for not going. I think it’s stupid. Why would anyone think like this? If shopping cancelled we can just go another day.

Ok what should I do today? I didn’t do dishes last night – so I have a load of dishes to wash. I have to find time in between the day and finish it. Should dispose off that huge banana leaf from the kitchen and maybe a couple of cardboard boxes. I have to sweep and possible mop the house. Some important work today has gotten postponed to tomorrow. But I still have lots to do – I mean office work. And I wish people stopped disturbing me unnecessarily. It’s really annoying and distracting. Sometime I feel downright disrespectful that people think it’s ok to disturb others any time of any day that they want. Practice some piano and maybe start reading a book.

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