Woke up at 9 o clock today. Smoked right away after waking up. And then the scooter wouldn’t start. So took the car and bought some fuel. The scooter still won’t start. I’m going to the store to get some engine oil after writing this. The car was making some noise too. Some clacking noise with every rotation of the wheel. But when I was coming back after buying the fuel, the noise was gone. I wonder what’s wrong. I think it might be because it’s just lying idle in the parking because of the lockdown.
S shouted at me again yesterday. I feel so bad when she does. She’s getting fired up by very little things and starts saying the utmost bitter things. Sometimes I feel like I should just give up all this and go back to my carefree, drinking-partying lifestyle. I’ve dragged myself into all this only because of my desire to have my own family. How do I let this go? How do I redeem myself?
I need to go back to the shop now. Engine oil, weighing scale and acrylic paint if available at yd-mart. Feeling a bit worried to take the car back out – because of the noise. And I don’t know how I’m gonna get it fixed in all this lockdown. I hope it all opens tomorrow.
After coming back, I get started making the desk. I finally finished designing it and making a cut list. One important task will get ticked off if I complete that. It’s really long pending that pooja shelf. 4 months pending. I dread the thought of making it though. Especially because of the hot summer. But I know how satisfying and happy it’d feel after finishing it.
Also I have to catch up on some office work. Just to keep the week relaxed. I wish they re-opened the office. I feel bored and sick to stay at home all the time. I want to see some people. I also feel motivation is dropping because of not meeting people. It feels like I’m just sitting somewhere alone with no connection whatsoever to the outside world. Maybe I should make more meetings.
And add to that some piano practice. One hour I should allocate for this today. Total three things – make the desk/stand, practice piano one hour, spend some time to catch up on office work.
Why am I getting distracted so much? I can’t even focus on something for half an hour continuously. Something seriously wrong and maybe too late to fix. I’ve switched tab to YouTube like 10 times since I started writing this post. Seriously wrong. I should practice focus.
Okay. Let me carry on with the day then. Hope all turns out well in the end.